And I don't understand all the things you've seen

Yeah, it's whatever. Words are getting so old. Tired of talking, typing, writing, everything. Being happy one second and impossible to read the next has just gotten old. For me and I assume for everyone around me too. A little spice right now would be cool. So cool.

Being sick has taken a major toll on me and my attitude, I guess. Well, actually, I'm sure of this. I'm just tired of being cooped up and feeling drained without using an ounce of energy. The funny thing is that I feel I have no energy. I'm sure this is only a phase that comes along with being stuck in the house, but you know, it's all good. I'm trying so terribly to not worry and let my mind wander. Oh, but sometimes it's so great to ponder how things could be. Not necessarily how they should be, but how I would fancy them if I could make some drastic changes. Oh dear, I'm so tired. Heading back to school around midweek will do wonders for me, I think. I truly hope so.

I am waiting for something (not someone) new and beautiful. I just, I want that feeling again. I think things can be better and ultimately that's up to me, no matter how much trouble it may seem to be at the time. I can do this, you know, because I want to and have to and it will be worth it.